Wednesday: Before Editing and After

Before Editing and After

Today’s installment of BEA comes courtesy of ANONYMOUS.

“Oh please, Grant. You know, you’re right to be ashamed of yourself, you tracksuit-wearing hypocrite. Not because you’re a hypocrite, but because you’re too fucking afraid to admit it. And isn’t that just a bit mad? Brother, you’ve killed more than the number of times you’ve fucked your wife.”

“Oh, please, Grant. You’re just a hypocrite in a tracksuit. You’re right to be ashamed of yourself—you can’t even admit it! And isn’t that mad, Brother? You’ve done more killing than fucking.”

How would you have rewritten it? Put your answers in the comments below!

Would you like a free paragraph-edit? To be featured in Before Editing and After, send your passage of up to 150 words (along with your name and a link to your webspace) to Blog@CiceroGrade.com. Thanks!

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